Thursday, August 31, 2006

Jeff George is back

In case you missed it "The Raydas" have signed Jeff George as their #4 QB - many in the sports world are mocking this decision.

Jeff George was a marvelously skilled QB with, arguably, the best arm of his generation ...... but he was hated by coaches, team mates, fans and media alike. You have to be a supreme asshole to be as talented as Jeff George and still not be able to get a job in a league that has no problem giving large cheques to convicted felons but Jeff has been on the outside looking in for 4 years and is now 38 years old.

To the legion of scoffers Jason Whitlock, the supremely talented columnist for the Kansas City Star, sums it up brilliantly:

"Jeff is like the hottest girlfriend you ever had.

Oh, she might've been bat-spit crazy, slept with all of your boyz and is in need of medication, but two or three months after the breakup all you really remember is the great sex, the weekends in Vegas and the two-month, drama-free period when you thought you'd found your very own Halle Berry.

And you know what? Under the right conditions, you'd take her back, and you'd even bring her around your boyz again. But there would be no talk of a serious relationship, no public affection, no contact with your parents, very little kissing, and you'd eat out at Applebee's or maybe Red Lobster on a special occasion.

Don't act like you wouldn't. If you're over 25, don't act like you haven't. This is real talk.

If you go into it with your eyes open, you can milk two or three years of friends-with-benefits happiness out of it, and have the freedom to bag any of her friends without a bit of guilt."

That, my friends is inspired sports journalism.

I have always been a Raider hater but this time I've gotta hand it to them - a stroke of genius,

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

A Really Good Burger

Burgers are an important food to me, I grew up in small town Ontario and there was no fast food or mass market burgers. On the rare occasions when we ate in a restaurant, holidays or on the road only, I always ordered a burger and was rarely disappointed.

But modern times have conspired against the noble burger: first it was fast food and the comically small cardboard "burgers" that have become standard, then e-coli and Canadian over reaction meant that even at a real restaurant my burger had to be incinerated, then the $50 foie gras and Kobe beef things started appearing (which are, I'm sure, superb but calling something with foie gras and Kobe beef in it a "burger" is like calling Uma Thurman a "single mom" - it's accurate but just wrong). Yes it is hard times for the burger on the restaurant front, but at home is a different story - the burger still reigns.

Wife rarely cooks but she does "grill" and she also makes transcendent burgers.

Yesterday I battled the hordes at the PNE with daughter and dragged my sorry ass home around 6ish, tired, dusty and more than a little thirsty/hungry/grumpy but bouyed by the thought that wife was cooking burgers. A shower and a cold Pilsner took care of much of my woes and the burger took care of the rest.

Wife's burgers are not complex, just lean organic beef, salt, pepper, diced onion and grated cheddar. Wife's grilling technique is "cook 'em for a little while on one side, then flip them over and cook 'em for a little while on the other side, then flip 'em again, top with cheese and cook 'em a little while longer". The resulting, sloppy, pink in the middle masterpiece was garnished with mustard, mayo, tomato, lettuce, avocado and bacon and served on a Kaiser roll with fresh corn-on-the-cob and a bottle of full throttle fruity Malbec.

Forget the Foie gras and Kobe beef, hell forget Uma .......... sometimes all you need is a really good burger.

Dinner in the Back Yard

Last Friday we dined "al fresco" with the neighbours.

It started out with my comment to Dr. A, on Thursday, that wild coho was on sale at Choices (I'm a compulsive "flyer" shopper). Her response was "Well I guess I know what we're having tomorrow night" and I said that I'd already picked up a big fillet. The idea was then proposed for a "house dinner" and agreed upon.

So on a sunny Friday evening we set up our dining room table in the backyard with dinner for 6 adults (neighbour's mom plus visitor from England) while daughter and "almost 3" T-money ate at the plastic picnic table.

Appetizers were edamame from the garden with cold Pilsner. Dinner was grilled coho brushed with garlic-lime butter, fresh Fraser Valley corn and roasted squash (again from the garden), Doctor A and I drank 2003 Riesling Kabinett from Selbach Oster while others drank something red.

Post dinner was a bit of coffee and Macallan 15 while the kids went to bed.

For years I barely knew my neighbours and now we live in a commune, wierd ........ but good.

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

Stunningly Bad Beer Commercial

OK, it's summer so my TV watching is way down (late nights on the front deck with a cocktail having replaced TV watching with a cocktail).

After all long days, cold beer and re-runs all add up to little time in front of the box.... but the other night I felt like a little mindless tube exploration. At some point a commercial comes on for Kokanee and I am stunned by the level of dumbness this commercial reaches.

Yes, I am aware that beer commercials are not generally a high art form but at least most of them try to have a bit of humour and tell us why we should drink the product. The commercial in question has a parasailing Sasquatch on a waterski, three girls in bikinis on JetSkis, a houseboat with a hot tub and......a leering porn-moustached "Park Ranger" who actually says something like "Hubba Hubba".

The Ad says nothing about the brand except for the tag line "the beer out here"....... "out here" is apparently the mind of a high school senior with a big budget.

Please for the love of God........bring back "Brew".

Thursday, August 10, 2006

Dine and Roll

Last night one of my brethren got beat on a "Dine and Dash", with a twist.

A Dine and Dash is when the guest leaves without paying their tab, in other words when they steal their dinner. The cost of the tab comes out of the servers pocket in most cases, although the labour laws are a little unclear on the true responsibility.

Many restaurants have a "D & D" fund where servers contribute a dollar a shift towards covering these occurrences..... ours does not.

The twist on last night's D & D is that the perpetrator was in a wheelchair. The "Roller" wheeled away and when confronted, 50 yards away, said "Oh, yeah I paid...I gave it to the guy in the jacket (our General Manager)". By the time my "brother in apron" was able to confirm lack of payment the "Roller" was long gone.

Hall of Fame Baby, Hall of Fame.

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

Hall of Fame

The Baseball Hall of Fame inducted Bruce Sutter this week, once more proving that Hall of Fame voters are idiots.
After all Willie Mays only received votes from 95% of voters and Ted Williams only 93% - so 5% to 7% of these experts don't think Mays and Williams belong in the Hall of Fame.

Bruce Sutter is, by all accounts, a nice man and was a very good relief pitcher during his 13 year career. Bruce Sutter is not a Hall of Famer, his numbers just aren't good enough. This is the Hall of Fame and should be reserved for the Greatest Players in the game not the "Hey he was the best reliever in the National League for most of the '80's".

There are 4 standard "numbers" systems for measuring Hall of Famer's and Sutter doesn't meet ANY of them. Check out Baseball Reference if you want the details, but trust me Bruce's numbers just don't add up. Okay so there should be exceptions made for players who contribute to "great teams"( the Whitey Ford, Catfish Hunter syndrome) but again Sutter is lacking, having appeared in only one World Series in his career.

Sutter's major points come from leading the NL in saves 5 times, a nice accomplishment but this is ......... The Hall of Fame.

Sutter doesn't belong.

Goose Gossage on the other hand, now there was a Hall of Fame reliever........ and don't even get me started on how Ryne Sandberg is in and Andre Dawson isn't.